What Happens If You Slip On a Banana Peel

Today, I just came out of the hospital. I had an accident, but how I got into that accident? Well, that’s a long story. It started four months ago, on a bright sunny day. Everything was perfect, I got all the green signals while driving to work, but the one thing that ruined it all was a banana peel.

“Yo, Diane! Have those files ready? We’ll need the code from them,” I said, twisting my head to look at my assistant.

“Yes, they are ready for approval,” answered Diane.

“Do you think we can get the project approved?” I asked Diane.

“Don’t know…let’s hope for the best. Your meeting is at 2:00,” said Diane.

“Let’s go to my office to test the codes in the file, I’ll just read the codes, and if it gets approved, we can carry out the plans,” I suggested.

“There are a few documents in the testing area I need. I’ll meet you there in 10 minutes,” Diane said.

“Knock yourself out, and are those the documents from the contract?” I asked.

“Yeah, they are. I need to review them before the approval of the project. We need to get them signed.” Diane replied.

“Go ahead,” I said.

Diane gave me a pleasant smile. She walked away and turned into the North corridor. I clicked the elevator’s up button and waited for it to open. That’s when I heard Diane’s voice.

“AAAH! NO FOOD IN THE TESTING AREA!” Diane screamed.

I walked away from the elevator and peeked into the North Corridor. I stepped inside and noticed Diane chewing out Mark and Davie. They were the troublemakers.

“Diane? Everything okay?” I asked.

She looked at me with her ‘She’s gonna blow!’ look, and I fell silent.

“It seems these two ACCIDENTALLY brought FOOD into the TESTING AREA!!!” she screamed at me.

Davie and Mark looked at me, waiting for my response. I just walked further in.

“NOOOO! DON’T STEP THERE!!!” screamed Diane.

“Huh?” I asked, but it was already too late, and I slipped.

Diane diverted her attention from Davie and Mark to me. 

“Are you okay?!” asked Diane.

I whimpered. OKAY?!! OKAY?!!! I had just slipped marbled tiles! I WAS NOT OKAY!!!!!

I used all my remaining strength to say, “Diane, get me a doctor,” and that’s all I remember before I blacked out.

I woke up in the hospital three days later. “What is all this??” I thought. I felt dazed. I tried to sit up, “Owwwwwww! My back, my back,”

The door opened, and a doctor walked in with a tear-drenched Diane.

“Don’t worry, Miss. We gave your spine surgery, it is mending now, and the process is complete. Just two more days, and you’re free to go,” said the doctor.

“What happened?” I asked groggily.

“Oh, it was horrible! I called an ambulance, and they rushed me to the emergency room. They examined you and said that your spine broke!” Diane said.

“Oh,” I replied. I had no idea what to say. It took me 5 seconds to think about the meeting. “Oh, NOO! I missed the meeting! What happened?”

“I don’t know. I was too busy following the ambulance, and by the time I got back, it was 1:45. I went to the meeting room, but the security guards wouldn’t allow me in without you. We couldn’t get the project approved. I am so sorry!” Diane apologized.

I slumped back in my chair. I worked on this project for two years!

“Two full years,” I mumbled. “Down in the dumps,”

Diane took a sharp inhale. She failed. Diane spent all night researching for open spots to showcase their project. She found one! They would have their meeting in a week at 9:00!

The next day at the hospital was okay. Diane dropped by with her famous apple pie. She told me what was happening in the office. Then, (the day after) she gave me the BEST NEWS EVER!!!

“So, you know about the meeting,” said Diane. She scraped off some of the apple pie on her plate.

“Urgh! Don’t remind me!!” I groaned. I tried to roll over, but it was a little hard too.

Diane sighed and walked to the other side so I could face her.

“I thought I’d be fine by now!!” I yelled into my pillow.

“The doctors said one more day. Then your free!” Diane said gently. Her voice drifted off, which meant visiting hours were over. 

“Hmmph,” I said. Then I fell asleep.

Diane came back the next day.

“So, how’s your spine?” she asked.

“I can roll over now! The doctors are discharging me at noon.” I said joyfully.

“Guess what! I have news!!” Diane squealed.

“What?” I demanded.

“You got a meeting on Friday! At 9:00!” Diane sang.

“WHAT!??? Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!!!” I squeaked.

Diane merely smiled. “Yup!”

At noon, I thanked the hospital for helping me. Yet, before I left, they warned me, “Your spine has not mended fully. Take it easy for a couple of weeks,” they said.

I was far from the testing area for the next few days. I sent Diane instead. I tested the codes, and I reviewed my speech. Then the moment of truth arrived.

I got to work extra early, but I couldn’t find Diane. I phoned her, and she didn’t pick up. That only meant Diane was inside a car stuck in traffic! She texted back, “Cu in 30 min,”

I made a clicking sound, but I went back to work. Diane arrived at around 8:30. I had the documents. I had the speech, but when she looked over, she looked at me, turning white.

“What?” I thought I had done a pretty good job.

She managed to gasp, “THE FILES!!!”

Blood started to pound in my ears. I ran to my car and pulled out of the parking lot. I made it back in 10 minutes. I looked flustered.

“Here, *pant*, are the, *wheeze*, files.” I panted, handing the files to Diane.

“Okay, let’s go!” she said.

We ran down the halls and grabbed the documents and the speech.

“AAAAAAGH! THE ANIMALS ESCAPED!” yelled a voice.

Diane and I covered our ears. What happened? Was everything okay???

We walked into the intersection. Then straight into the A room.

Diane was behind me as we were striding into the room. The sounds continued, louder this time.

“He, Hello?” I asked into the pitch-black silence.

Something went off, and a metal thing creaked.

“AAAAHHH! UREGHHHHH!!” I squealed. Something was attacking me!! Then suddenly, my skin started to burn!

“ANTS!!!” I yelled.

A pail knocked over, and I slipped yet again. I was just lying there, screaming.

Diane managed to find the switch. When she did, I was a mess. Davie and Mark were pulling a little PRACTICAL prank on ME!!!

“UURGH!” screamed Davie as the lights came on. She accidentally kicked me. Then Mark got some of the red ants and practically JUMPED onto me. Then something fell from the top of the room. A heavy box! I could have caught it if I had a mended spine! It fell on top of my back. I hit the ground. These things are funny, but not when they happen to me. The lights closed and the door locked. So Davie, Mark, and I spent time tripping and slipping on water. Then the red ants! Then the pecking thing. Finally, someone came and rescued us. I heard pounding on the closet door. I think Diane was locked inside. They rescued her once they had found the keys. Then they sent Davie, Mark, and me to the emergency room. In the end, I had a broken back, a broken arm, shredded skin, tiny wounds on my head, and a twisted ankle. Forget the meeting, of course. Diane visited every day.

That’s why you should never slip on a banana peel.